After the First Day Fades


Summer 2005 - Moving into my 1st Grade classroom
My parents asked for this Photo Op for old times sake in the midst of moving in.


After literally a lifetime preparing and dreaming of my own classroom, the highly anticipated first day of school had finally arrived. I had planned, prepped and romanticized about how perfectly executed our storybook first day would go! All those starry- eyed childhood playdates filled with pretend curriculum and makeshift summer classrooms on front porches; with stuffed animals,  had not prepared me for real students who acted their age, with real tears, real potty accidents, and oh no...who gave them scissors on the first day of school?!


This is a picture from my second year teaching in 2006. This class was very special to me as they played the hand bells in our wedding when I came down the aisle. 


Somehow in all my dreaming, it had not included a precious, albeit too curious, first grade boy experimenting with his brand new school supplies - scissors - on his neighbor's beautiful hair! College did not prepare me for that phone call. My degree did not teach me that young children can mistake an Elmer's glue stick for a Push Pop Lollipop and that said teacher would be the one helping get glue out of their teeth in the midst of wiping tears, bottoms and noses while consoling the homesick, the happy and the hog wild  on the first day of school. Oh, and what did the principal think I was going to do with those super detailed, A+, professor approved, neatly printed lesson plans? Those went straight in the trash can after that first day!

My lesson plans did not account for the scared parents who were nervous to hand their most precious treasure over to a brand new teacher. No practicum experience taught me how to manage the end of the day dismissal and a little boy's bathroom emergency where he would not exit to restroom  and I had 25 six year olds to get to their busses by myself.  My schema had no prior knowledge of the parents who seemed to be so uninterested in their child's wellbeing little lone their education. College did not  prepare me for the tears streaming down a homesick child's face who found comfort under her desk and would not come out. I wanted to join her and I'm certain that after school when the classroom was empty (much like my energy reserves) it seemed like a perfectly good option to me, as well! To me, the hardest part of the first day of school was the realization that I had to get up and do it  all over again the next day!!

That day in late August,  no textbook, student teaching, or years of dreaming could prepare this girl for - the first day-  in MY own classroom several years ago.  Truth be told, I cried just like the children and their parents that first day of school, not under my desk, but after school across the hall to Betsey,  who became my mentor and "framily" (A friend who is like family). You see this friendship was solidified when the above mentioned little boy needed assistance in the bathroom and 25 other students needed to hold my hand to get to the bus. At this moment, I sure wished there had been about 10 other teachers' names on the classroom door, but alas, there was only mine! I called for assistance across my outdoor portable classroom walkway to Betsey who had her own classroom of new first graders. The difference was she had several years of experience and a student teacher. She came to my rescue that day and many, many, others since. She gave me so much grace that first year (as did the parents) and I truly did, as they say, "Fake it until you make it" and believed myself into being a REAL teacher with REAL students. The truth is where experience was lacking love bridged the gap. I loved those children. I loved their families. And, most days, I loved my job teaching them.


So on this dark, rainy, third day of school in our district, I say to parents and teachers alike, WE CAN DO THIS!  Even now,  the first day of school usually throws a curve ball or two in my preschool classroom or with my own children as I take them off to their new classrooms! Now I get to be the scared mom who is afraid to let go!

However, over the years, thankfully  I have realized that it isn't just my name on the class assignments or hanging from the door. I have also realized that I am not sending my own children "off into the world" when I feel anxious about letting them go embark on a new year.  So where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and Earth. He is the author and perfecter of plans and His purposes are my guide.  I think he has a pretty big sense of humor, as He and I walk through some of the very unpredictable scenarios that young children give us!  God, the creator of the all things, cares about the details. He cares about the first days, the last days and each one in-between. He has gone before us to prepare the way. It is our job to recognize the strength we have as Christians because Christ, the great I Am, lives in us! His power is in us.


This morning at 4:00 AM when sleep would not come, the rain did. I started thinking of all the teachers, children and parents waking up to this rainy third day of school in our district. I thought about how just enough time has passed from the first day of school to realize now on day three, that there are 177 more wake ups, rush out the door and hit the ground running hard-all-day until next Summer. For parents like me, the hot breakfasts stopped yesterday for my kids and the cereal made a grand entrance this morning! The newness has already started to fade and the routine is forming.


 I have learned quite a few things over the years as a teacher and as a parent.  I am thankful to realize that these take aways apply to both:


  1. There is so much that I do not know but God has equipped me with what I need today.
  2. Love can bridge gaps, when years of experience lack. You have to LOVE them before you can TEACH them!
  3. There will be curve balls! So put on your Catcher's Mitt and don't be surprised when it comes!
  4.  Never say never.
  5.  Be prepared for future funny stories to be born out of First Day experiences....                                                                         Please note, it will not be funny on the first day, haha!

What does all of this mean for you? Teacher or not, whether you have children or you yourself are back to school or starting a new job, first days come with an array of emotion. They can be exciting, unpredictable, filled with nerves, anticipation and jitters! But, usually our adrenaline carries us through the rollercoaster of feelings that fill that first day. However, it's day 2, day 3, day 53, and so on, that in all honesty ARE so much more difficult than the first. When anticipation and adrenaline have fleeted, and we are left with facing the repetition of tomorrow,  I pray that God purposes the path before you and faith carries you through the realness of routine.





                       A little glimpse of my first two years teaching 1st grade....


 I loved these children and they learned to love me back! Together, we learned a lot! They are young adults preparing to head off to college and beyond - which makes me feel so unbelievably old.








Before we were engaged and long before we were married, Rob would come and read to my classes.


The most amazing volunteer and friend a girl could ask for, Ms. Donna!






My 2nd year teaching 1st grade. My husband, Rob, proposed to me this school year. These precious children were in our wedding. They played "Cannon in D" as I came down the aisle. I will always and forever be grateful to our music teacher at that school, my friend, Michelle Funderburk.









Back to School

Second Grade Jenny - Just had finished a long summer of teaching stuffed animals and baby dolls.



End of Summer. It's the season of freshly sharpened pencils, 50 cent boxes of crayons, crisp folders and fresh starts. For some, it is a time of  new clothes, new shoes, new dreams and new possibilities. For others, it is a reminder of what they go without, dreams that seem out of reach and a return to the building that makes them feel so out of place.

Whether teacher, administrator, student or parent, this new year brings with it the opportunity to choose the course in which we will walk.

 It is a choice each day to pick up the baggage of the past, of lies we tell ourselves, or of past mistakes we have made. Or, a choice to suit up in the armor of who God says we are as we make our way into the world each day.

As I prepare for my preschoolers to return, many back to school memories have flooded my mind. My first year teaching was spent in a portable "learning cottage" about a half of a mile away from the front office. I had too much passion and enthusiasm to realize how much I didn't know. In the 12 years since then, I have spent 7 years in public school, 2 as a stay at home mom and am now entering my fourth year in a private preschool and kindergarten. The biggest change as I enter my classroom, still filled with passion and enthusiasm, is that I now realize how much I don't know.

That first year in the classroom I  was filled so much hope in what my children would accomplish, do and become..that perhaps some of the "good" that inflated my dreams, also inflated my head.

I realize that there are strategies, research theories and instructional models that I don't know.  Every day I am learning new ways to reach children and partner with parents. I look everywhere for inspiration, research and diligence on ways to teach children and touch lives. However, that is not my sole focus.

Not only does each little person who walks into my room carry a story with them, but so does the teacher next door, across the hall, in the office and around the school. It is easy to lose sight of the community around us when we are solely focused on building the community within our own room.

So, go on, get out of your comfort zone and go love on the new teacher, the mean teacher, the hurting teacher, the awkward teacher, the janitor, the bookkeeper who always reminds you that you didn't fill out the form correctly, the lunch lady, the teacher who yells, the teacher who is sick, the teacher who you love to dislike, the teacher who intimidates you, all of them, those people, whether they know it or not, "those people" who were created in Christ's image just like yourself!

As Christian's we are called to resist satan and sometimes forget that also means to resist acting like him! Let us not be called into the profession of education as ambassadors of Christ and act so un-Christ like.

Because, if we are truly trying to follow Him, our life should speak a language of love. Love one another as He has loved us. Even if that means change or challenge or discomfort.
Now, go get your coffee and get busy changing the world, influencing the future and loving your neighbor.


Guest Blogger- Brooke French


Dog Days of Summer


Ya’ll, Am I the only one struggling with the last weeks of summer?  The heat is blazing, the pool and ocean feel more like bath water, work is still buzzing along and the kids are mildly irritable due to the lack of routine.  Honestly, I am also a little sad that summer is almost over too.  Is it just me?  Surely, I hope not.  I know I like structure, but I was really planning on a restful, renewing and fun filled summer.
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You know the type of summer I am talking about.. beautiful scenery, relaxing beach reads, kids frolicking in the sand, laughing joyfully at each others’ jokes.  Husbands and wives taking late evening strolls by the beach, discussing their hopes and dreams, all the while lovingly gazing in each other’s eyes.  And let us not forget the balance of school readiness and extracurricular activities to boast about when the kids get asked.. Did you go anywhere this summer?  What did you do? Any fun camps? What neat experiences did you have this summer?  Oh the writing prompts, they will be prepared for when they return to school.
Insert  Kids are snappy, staying up late, and chaotic, at best, in their thinking and relating to everyone. There is a lot of repeating from mom- “clean up the mess, please don’t climb on that, please give me 5 minutes, no- I do not want to start a craft project 5 minutes before we are out the door, oh you need to upload another video to another mildly inappropriate song, oh wait- you’re bored!”  Mom and Dad are exhausted because- the kids.  They stay up late too with the kids, but they still have to wake up in the morning because jobs.  Money is literally being sprayed out the window between groceries, camps, and fun excursions.  And you know that amazing summer vacation that you dreamed about in May; well, it turned into a little field trip because traveling with kids, is a field trip.  All the while, the school readiness is about as crisp as those cute, unopened teaching workbooks you bought from Amazon. Bless…
IMG_5305Please know that they were fighting prior, during and after this picture was taken. They were also angry about how fast the ice cream was melting. 
Who is with me?  Please tell me I am not alone!
Then after all this exhaustion and spiraling, I tend to let guilt and shame creep in. I create a list in my head of the “shoulds” and “could haves”. I should have read 20 minutes everyday with my children, we should have had more fun this summer, we could havetaken more selfies at all our fun excursions (Costco & Target) and posted it on IG because #bestsummerever.  So then, shame reminds me that I lost my patience daily, I locked myself in the bathroom sometimes two to three times daily just to get PEACE and I spent way too much time on social media. Social media encourages me to not only feel guilty and bad about my own parenting choices, it also allows me to compare my #bummersummer with everyone else’s beautiful vacations, happy days and smiling faces.  Read–worst idea EVER!
It is silly really because the day to day stuff is real life.  Somewhere along the way, we have let the world tell us that our lives have to be big, powerful and extravagant to mean something.  We think our daily lives with our children, family & friends need to be full of powerful and impactful moments.
Can I just preach for a minute…?  That is not real life.  I am constantly telling my daughter that her Disney shows, Netflix movies and Youtube videos are not real life.  I want her to know that a real boyfriend doesn’t have to choose between you and the other cute girl in a funny 30 minute episode.  She needs to know that real, true friendships encourage and lift each other up .
I think that is what our Heavenly Father wants us to know today.  Ladies, that idea we have in our head of summer, back to school or of a perfect home.. is not real life.  God cups our sweet, beautiful, tired faces in His hands and says -“My sweet, sweet child, why are you working so hard to cultivate unrealistic expectations? That is not the life I have created for you”.  The real life for us is in the tears when we mess up.  It is in the grace we give ourselves after we yell again. Real life is found in the frowny faces and whiney, homebound days.  Our God wants to be invited into the details of our days.  We learn how to love and extend grace in those dog days of summer.  God is in the details of our daily lives. He sees our messy houses, our bank accounts, our dreams, and our love for our family and Him.  His love never changes! There is nothing we can do to make Him love us less and nothing we can do to make Him love us more.
Consumed unmet longings
Rest in that today and in the coming weeks.  Let’s let go of what we think should be and truly embrace what is.  There are gifts here in real life planted for us from Our Heavenly Father.  Let us not miss those gifts, being stuck on what’s missing.IMG_5336

To read more from today's guest blogger, Brooke French, please visit her blog here.